I'm feeling a lot of mixed emotions and I honestly can't remember the last time I felt comfortable. I'm not even sure if it's normal to feel as restless as I am.
My dream is to be stable enough in all all aspects of my life that I'm already able to help other people. Right now, I'm just trying to stay ahead of everything. It's like I'm in a rat race. I'm actually in love with the adrenaline rush that I usually feel but I'm just more tired than I ever was. My only goal for today is to find an inspiration. It's also my goal for every day.
Sometimes, I wish for my head to stop thinking. I wish that I can just close my eyes and vanish. I hate myself for being so deep. I hate myself for always being poetic and for trying to think of a reason for every occurrence in my life. I also hate myself for not being able to share the many great ideas in my head. Sometimes, I just wish I can just write all day. I actually don't think I will ever get tired of writing my thoughts. It's like my only escape from the real world. Can you feel how crazy my thoughts are? Most of the time, they just keep on flowing with no valid point.
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